Review for "Conversations with Friends" by Sally Rooney

I kept reading this, wanting it to get better, and it just never did.

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆ (1.00/5)

I'll preface this with my reason for picking this up in the first place. I had never heard of this book before, it was not even remotely on my radar. The only thing I knew about the author was that she had a wildly popular book last year, Normal People. But look, I'm a huge Taylor Swift fan. If you didn't know, Taylor Swift released her eighth full-length studio album on July 24 of this year. There is one song on the album, illicit affairs, which always reminds me of a book called My Dark Vanessa. Then I heard a rumor that the inspiration for illicit affairs was actually a different book called Conversations with Friends. I'm not sure if that's even true, but I figured if there were similar themes between that song and this book it was worth checking out. After reading the book, I can confirm that the two plotlines are similar, so the rumor may have truth to it. Unfortunately, everything Taylor Swift did right in her songwriting, Sally Rooney did wrong in her novel-writing. 

I disliked every single one of these characters, (except maybe Phillip who is in about 5% of the novel). Not in the way where you dislike a character but can appreciate the realism of their moral grayness, but in the way where they are all just pompous, insufferable bastards. The way Frances and Bobbi would go off on holier-than-thou political tangents was the most pretentious thing I’ve had the displeasure of reading, and it was constant in this novel. 

It was also very difficult for me to empathize with Frances as a protagonist because she was so undeserving of empathy. She sleeps with a married man and is openly hostile to his wife even though she’s the one in the wrong. This book was just the most stereotypical version of an extramarital affair ever - an older married guy with a young woman who believes that he loves her enough to leave his wife for her. It was cringe-inducing to read.

Another thing I hated regarding the characters - it does that thing where all the female characters swear that this guy is sooooo great when all evidence points to the contrary - the man in question being Nick of course. Bobbi and Frances both mention how Nick really is a good person, while at the same time recognizing and accepting the way he is manipulative (that being his habit of being super submissive so he doesn’t have to take any blame - a really common manipulation tactic of abusers especially those who target younger women). Obviously Frances showed poor judgment in a lot of areas, but I still couldn’t help thinking, “what does she SEE in this guy?”

It doesn’t help that the relationships are not well-developed in a show-not-tell manner. We don’t get a feel for Frances and Nick’s relationship because Francis just tells us everything about how she feels about him, rather than the reader getting to experience that firsthand. I guess that’s just a general complaint about the writing - it seemed very monotone. Like Francis was just relaying events instead of living them. The result is reading about a lot of sex and not a lot of feelings.

Having finished this, I just don’t understand what the point of it was. I kept reading, waiting for it to get to the good part, the plot twist, the substantive part of the plot, but there was none. I am shocked at how many people were giving this 4 and 5 stars. 2 stars I understand, even 3 stars. But I just don't see any good in this. It was just this mess of a cheating scandal drawn out into 300 pages. It was not enjoyable and I do not recommend. I'm going to try to not associate this book with illicit affairs, lest it ruin a beautiful song.